The beauty of soft masculinity

Why it's so attractive when men show emotion

I’ve always been drawn to men in touch with their feminine side.

A softer kind of man.

A man “written by a woman.”

I fear masculinity has become toxic, trapping men under the suffocating constraints of patriarchy. We’ve taught little boys not to cry, growing into men who refuse to be vulnerable. Turning to emotional distance or nonchalance, an inability to connect or be truly seen.

But there’s something so powerful about men who dare to embrace their full sexuality. A man who exists in the complete spectrum of his humanity.

Because that’s precisely my point – masculinity and femininity are a spectrum.

We’re all a beautiful blend of both energies. A duality. A yin and yang. Two forces meant to complement one another.

Yet men are often deprived of their softer half. And I believe a successful relationship – a deep connectedness – requires a fluidity of both.

As a Type-A eldest daughter, I've always been fiercely independent and driven. I’m not looking for someone to dim this inherent strength, but who can meet it with equal emotional depth. I'm drawn to the kind of man who can hold space for my bold, masculine nature without feeling threatened. Who doesn't feel the need to dominate just to prove his worth.

In the same breath, I want a man who allows himself to be nurtured by my feminine energy. A man who allows himself to be held when the weight of the world becomes too heavy. A man who can safely let his walls down and just ‘be’ without the throes of toxic masculinity.

I hate that we’ve put such rigid labels on what defines masculinity and femininity.

Empathy and gentleness know no gender boundaries. Vulnerability is not a sign of weakness. Quite the opposite. It’s the cornerstone of genuine connection.

A willingness to express emotion and be truly seen at your most vulnerable is actually an intense display of emotional strength. And yet, we consistently define these traits as “feminine” and belittle the men who attempt to embrace their softer side.

So maybe it is unconventional, but I think it’s attractive when men cry.

I find myself deeply attracted to a man who shows up emotionally. Who doesn't need to be coached through basic empathy.

A man who approaches love with patience and intentionality. Who listens to truly understand.

A man who creates meaningful space for deep soul connections. Who values honest and open communication in a dating landscape that often feels surface-level.

A man who takes the time to study my body like poetry. Who is invested in my own pleasure and desires.

A man who values self-care without gendered limitations. Who understands that nurturing mind and body isn’t “girly” – it’s fundamentally human.

A man who expresses love openly. Who is unconcerned with performative toughness or fear of what “the boys” will think.

Bring back manly men? I believe we need to create safe spaces for men to explore their feminine energy. To remove the stigma that has kept them emotionally captive for generations.

I believe when we allow men to access their full emotional spectrum, we open the door to deeper, more authentic relationships.

Emotional maturity and tenderness don’t diminish masculinity – they elevate it.

A man who can access both his strength and his softness, who can protect and nurture, lead and follow, speak and listen, isn't less of a man.

He's more fully human.

I long for a world where emotional expression isn’t gendered. Where vulnerability is recognised as the strength it truly is.

I long for a world where men can simply exist.